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Just imagine the tasty goodness of partially hydrogenated oils oozing into the flavor-trapping nooks and crannies of the Ignite Waffle Beanie. As the mysterious yellowish grease melts and transforms magically into a vicscous clear snot-like material, the sicky-sweet syrup follows. Don't get any on your fingers, you'll have to wait for the top layer of skin to die off and molt before the stickiness goes away. Now take a bite and feel yourself swept away in processed-food ecstasy. If you listen carefully, you can actually hear your arteries harden.

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